Originally posted 10/12/2020
Welcome back to Mental Health Monday. I am tired. 2020 has been more than anyone could ever have imagined on every possible level. Health and safety concerns are a daily topic of discussion, politics are divisive, those who I love and respect on all sides of every issue are speaking and behaving in ways that seem out of character. I know I am not alone in this. As a society, a culture, a world—we are all exhausted. Our endurance has been tested time and again, and many of us have had our fill of trials that some call character building. We are working hard to be vigilant as citizens, and vigilance has made us tired. We are out of adrenaline for it.
The adrenaline-based fight or flight response is supposed to be a short-term response to intense situational stress—not a long-term state of being. We can’t exist indefinitely in a survival state without running out of energy. Many of us who were trying new recipes, picking up new hobbies, and going deep with cleaning and organizing early in the year have run out of steam. It feels like thousands of meals have been cooked, new hobbies are difficult to focus on, and any remaining closets can stay cluttered—the motivation is gone.
Many people are getting from day to day by the sheer routine of it. Routine can be a normalizer in the midst of chaos. However, our routines look different. Work-life balance has taken on different meaning as many are trying to work, parent, teach, and maintain their homes at the same time and from the same space. There is no separation. As a working parent with children who have moved away from home during this time, my work-life balance is more distant. I support my adult children via text and video chat, providing the best reassurance I can from a distance. We are a family who thrives on hugs, and that is not an option when we need it most. The huggers of the world struggle in this time of social distancing. Air hugs and elbow bumps are not the same, especially with those we love who are not a part of our household. My son is in Chicago—a town that requires a 14-day quarantine for anyone coming from our home state. My mom, who is grieving the loss of her mom, is in the higher risk category. I have too much exposure through my job for it to be safe to possibly pass germs to her—and cases continue to rise where she is.
How do we combat this time in our lives? There is no easy answer. I am so thankful for technology that allows calling, texting, and video chats during our time of distance. It is not exactly what we want, but it is a step in the right direction. I can see my kids’ faces and know that they are there and are hanging in there. I see my dear friends in my driveway, enjoying a drink around the fire pit and some much-needed conversation. I try to be patient with myself and with others, understanding that there will be ups and downs in emotions, productivity, and focus. I do my best to take the opportunity to speak life into others, ensuring that they are seen and heard in the midst of the distance. There is comfort in knowing that the feelings that we are having are normal, and even expected at this time.
We might be done with the chaos of 2020, but it is not done with us. With patience and grace, we will make it through—and we will have stories to tell and lessons learned, whether we want them or not!
Thanks for reading! 😊 EW